Contemplating the Sting of Words

As I sit with coffee and computer this morning, I reflect on a conversation I have been having for weeks with a new friend. What makes others feel the need to tell our stuff? You know the age old gossip struggle.

My friend has walked a road of bad choices in her recent past. She is beginning to open herself up to God and the chance at new life. The hurtful words of others begin to sting. The efforts to improve life for herself seem worth nothing.

God is doing a new thing in her. All I can do is continue to point her towards that truth. I am still so haunted by that thought about others opinions of our choices.

Is it the age of social media that gives us the bravery to post things that cut? Is it insecurity with ourselves that leads us to tell others things shared in secret by a friend? Are we really superior when others mistakes show up bigger than ours? Are we willing to lose a lifetime of friendship for a word about someone that will turn them away once they know we have spoken it?

I hurt for my friend. She is trying so hard to make her new life work. She is digging into the word, attending church and making efforts to make the most of her situation. I am so proud of her. I tell her often. Sometimes though the cutting words of others scream louder in her ears.

I know that Romans 8:1  says, "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus".  As I think on this verse though, I wonder what to do for my friend who feels the world around her is condemning her. I remind her that no one can judge her actions except God Himself. 

Join me in praying for people today who feel the condemnation of others. May the TRUTH of God be heard louder than any small piece of gossip  today.

New Year & My ONE Word

I haven't blogged since the Fall. So many things have taken place and the world is moving a warped speed. (I have a million different topics floating through my mind as I write this now.) I prayed over my selection, I dug through scriptures, and I looked at other's One Word 365. There are so many good words out there to pick from and I struggled to find my ONE.

In the past, my word has been obvious that it spoke to me. This year I chose my word and still questioned 17 days later was it my word  or had I just settled. This week I think I have realized something- I have picked the right word.

My ONE WORD for 2013 is ......

Focused. See I feel scattered, disjointed, pulled, distracted and most of all not clearly FOCUSED. I am looking at a year of decision-Some for me, some that my children will make, and some with Philip.  As apart of a group study & church challenge, I was entering January with a food fast of sorts ( 7, a mutiny against excess by Jen Hatmaker). I thought this is the perfect storm to become FOCUSED.  Even as I began my journey into 2013, I have struggled by not feeling I chose the right word. I have finally decided this week that I am on target.

I have bounced from thing to thing &  thought to thought all week. I am beginning to feel like a ping pong ball. It hit me hard today- FOCUS! I am lacking focus.

So I decided to sit still, a write my thoughts. This will be a place where I can remind myself of my WORD. I believe the clearing of my body of yucky food & my thoughts from that food to God's call on my life is step one of the year of FOCUSED living!

Old Testament - New Lessons

Yesterday I was reading in Genesis (Day 12 of the Chronological Bible). I got to Jacob, Rebekah, Esau, Issac and my eyes were opened to several new truths.

First of all, I was hit smack between the eyes as a Mom when I read that Rebekah is the one who started the whole blessing reversal scam. It said that she grabbed Jacob and told him to bring two prized goats in. She overheard the conversation between Esau and Issac about the blessing and she wanted it for her "favorite"son.

Oh, my heart ached. Lord, help me not to be a Mom that schemes to change the blessing for my children. I pray that I'm not the stumbling block in their lives. I do not want to any day suggest that we do something to change their course. I pray that my life would be an example to them that leads them straight to God's plan and will for their future.

Secondly, I was taken by the Jacob's ladder story. I have sung.."We are climbing Jacob's ladder" since early preschool days. (hand motions and all) I never stopped to think about God speaking to me that way. I do dream vividly at night. I have had dreams about people I know and situations I am aware of. I realized this morning that God is might just be using my dreams to unfold something for me or people in my life. I need to seek Him more to see if this is the case. What is God saying to me at my Bethel? Am I hearing Him? Could He use me this way?

Where are you reading in God's word? What are you learning from Him?

Epiphany

It is Epiphany!
The day that we celebrate the Wise Men's visit to see baby Jesus. The Wise Men followed a star to a lowly manger where normally one would find animals, feed, hay, manure, muck...
Today they found Jesus. The Savior of the World. A tiny baby, soft and humble. What a rich find.

Out of the darkness, this bright light shone to the Wise Men leading them to this barn. Answers from the darkness. Light that shines on THE ANSWER.

I feel like I am in the beginning of a season of Epiphany. I have lived in some dark places over the past few years. I don't mean total depression, but some.
I mean a place with no answers. I have looked for healing from a disease that has caused some DIS-EASEMENT in my life. I am beginning upon answers.
I have felt a calling from God about something that he wants to lead me to. But what? I am still searching for that barn, but the light is leading me. (I feel it, I see it...I continue to search.)

I want to be Wise. I want God's wisdom for my life. I want to be lead to and by the Savior. I want to bow before his feet and celebrate His life! I want to see for myself His glory. I want to offer Him the best gifts that I have. I want to ABIDE-to dwell in His presence-to remain before Him.

Would you join me in Abiding this year? Do you have an Epiphany story...let's celebrate it!

Journey 2012

It is a New Year, 2012! I have been praying about and dwelling in several things to grow me this upcoming year. First, I have noticed several "bloggy" friends focus on one word for their year. I have decided to jump onto that bandwagon. My word for the year (cue the drum roll, please!) is ABIDE. I have spent the last few months hearing God speak this word to me. I plan to study, embrace and better understand the word and its impact on my life.

Second, challenge that I'm taking up is one offered to us in church yesterday. I had finished reading the Bible through in a year back in October. I had purchased a new One Year Chronological Bible thinking that I would jump right back into reading. Recommendation, is to not begin a chronological study in the middle-Common Sense runs deep in my family! Our challenge in church was to read more of God's word this year-whatever that might look like for you. (read a chapter, a book, a chunk, or the whole Bible I had been asking Philip about reading through the Bible in 90 days and then I remembered my Chronological Bible. Yesterday, I jumped back into my chronological study. I must admit that beginning with Adam and Eve was so much easier. (again this is Day 2 and all so I know that I sound like I've climbed Mt Everest).

Third, is a challenge that I began several weeks ago, but never stopped to blog about it. I am Hiding God's Word by memorizing Romans 8. This has been a bit of a challenge over the holidays. I have had a few wordy verses that are bogging me down. I have taken some of the hints and found them to be helpful. I am excited to be on this journey. I had spent several years with Beth Moore and her Scripture Memory plan. (2 verses per month/24 in a year). I can't wait to see a whole chapter complete in my heart!

I can't say this is really a challenge for the year, but it is something God is showing me so I want to document it. I have been feeling for awhile now that God was preparing me for something big. I mentioned before that I felt maybe our Spring Youth Mission Trip to Nicaragua was it. My first out of the country mission so I thought God was certain to let that be my BIG thing. Well, March came and went. Although it was impactful, I still have the sense of God's BIG preparation still happening. Well, I opened the book, Interrupted, by Jen Hatmaker and I sensed that God has been scheming for a while now. (again my common sense at work).  I see a pattern, a thread, a little clearing in the sky where He is writing. I can't see fully, but I know with abiding, reading and hiding I will understand more and more.

I am ready to dive in to 2012. I hope to capture the journey here.

My Gift

Advent- a coming into place, view, or being-arrival; the coming of Christ into the world.

As we begin the Christmas season, I had spent the Fall studying. My lessons covered the fruits of the Spirit-"Abiding Fruit". As a Mom, Wife, Daughter, Friend, Volunteer, Woman; I need to gain more love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, and self-control.

I have felt now for about a year, that God is preparing me for something. The feeling lead me in the Spring to answer a call to a mission trip. My feelings about 9 months later persist. I feel like in my study the view is becoming clearer. I feel, like my Christmas decorations, things are coming into place.

I tried introducing an advent devotional to my family. It is something that I am doing and wanted to share. I want this time to be a family waiting-waiting for our King. I know I can't push my waiting on everyone because it is my waiting. So I read, I study, I wait and I look. He is coming! The message that He is bringing to me will arrive in due time. I wait like a child on Christmas morning for the right time to open the gift.

I plan to view my gift with wide-eyes of excitement.

Lord, let me see your arrival - your gift to me. Let me rejoice in the arrival. Let me live out the calling.

Living the Easter Sunday Life

I had written and signed Easter cards to Mama and some friends. I headed to the post office for mailing. I ran inside to see if they had any pretty stamps for Easter. The man, who I usually joke with, said yes he had some that looked like Easter eggs. I said "sure" I would take them thinking this was my only option. He began sticking "Celebrate" stamps on my notes. Next he blurted out "What is Easter for anyway?"

I live in the "Bible Belt" so for a minute the question caught me off guard. I looked at him and said, "Well, (I felt like I was stammering) it is about Jesus death and resurrection." He began a small tirade (common for him on most topics) about why all the eggs and bunnies and stuff.

I paid and left my mail. The conversation left me pondering. Easter is my favortie time. I love Spring in general... New life, hope born. To me eggs, bunnies, baskets, and fuzzy ducklings, they do help me think about Jesus and His new life given to me.

 How do I communicate that with others? Am I caught up in the commercialism of a holiday? Do people only see the shiny new outfit on the outside, but no "new life" on the inside?

I so hope that my life reflects an Easter Sunday living-new life, new hope and celebration!