Weston Reed Fun Run-Raising Awareness for Heart Health in MS schools

Last night Sarah and three classmates had a Fun Run to remember and honor their friend Weston Reed who had a sudden cardiac arrest while playing soccer. Weston was in the sixth grade and would have been a part of the class of 2014. 

Sarah, Kyle, Hayden and Mary Dawson have worked with Weston's Dad, Lee Reed, to bring awareness to the need for heart test for student athletes and for the need for AEDs in all MS schools. The money raised at last night's race and the community sponsorship will go towards the purchase of an AED machine to be placed in a school in MS. 

The group of Seniors are also working with Senator Nancy Collins on a Bill for the MS Legislature to sign requiring all schools in MS have an AED machine. The schools in Tupelo have been blessed by the Weston Reed Foundation to have these machines, but so many other students in MS could benefit. These four students realize the value of saving a friends life. Their efforts are chronicled in today's local newspaper. See the article below. (notice the picture of my beautiful Sarah signing up a friend).

 Daily Journal Weston Reed Fun Run

Contemplating the Sting of Words

As I sit with coffee and computer this morning, I reflect on a conversation I have been having for weeks with a new friend. What makes others feel the need to tell our stuff? You know the age old gossip struggle.

My friend has walked a road of bad choices in her recent past. She is beginning to open herself up to God and the chance at new life. The hurtful words of others begin to sting. The efforts to improve life for herself seem worth nothing.

God is doing a new thing in her. All I can do is continue to point her towards that truth. I am still so haunted by that thought about others opinions of our choices.

Is it the age of social media that gives us the bravery to post things that cut? Is it insecurity with ourselves that leads us to tell others things shared in secret by a friend? Are we really superior when others mistakes show up bigger than ours? Are we willing to lose a lifetime of friendship for a word about someone that will turn them away once they know we have spoken it?

I hurt for my friend. She is trying so hard to make her new life work. She is digging into the word, attending church and making efforts to make the most of her situation. I am so proud of her. I tell her often. Sometimes though the cutting words of others scream louder in her ears.

I know that Romans 8:1  says, "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus".  As I think on this verse though, I wonder what to do for my friend who feels the world around her is condemning her. I remind her that no one can judge her actions except God Himself. 

Join me in praying for people today who feel the condemnation of others. May the TRUTH of God be heard louder than any small piece of gossip  today.

Real Life Healing

I have done it. I spent my most of my thirties in a fog. I was raising four children which I had no idea at the time that it is a tough job. I say often that I survived, but  really-I did. I had made this fictional idea of what life was to look like (insert Martha Stewart) and I had added my own christian twist to it.  But I was missing something. 

The late thirties hit and  I began to realize I longed for friendship -true friendship. I had people that I did things with because of the groups my kids put us in, but  I longed for a mentor. 

I began to be wrapped in this life of pain. One that I had no idea what was truly happening to me. Because of that physical pain I retreated into a year of solitude. It was a more lonely place than I had even felt before-one that lead me to a walk of light and hope. I would wrap my painful self in a blanket and read His word. I began to read the words of other women. I began to open up to a place of healing. I began to respond to those women and find friendship.

This year of healing -soul healing- lead me to discovery. I discovered places I loved to serve. The places I loved to serve became life giving which caused me to be open to relationship. Relationship taught me even more about the healing of my soul. 

Are there still places that are raw? Yes, the quick word or judgement from just the right person can send my soul bleeding and in retreat mode. But I go back to the Truth and find comfort in my chair then I am restored enough to move out again.

So my forties are a new place, a place of community where I can minister to the young mama's like I had so longed for in my younger days. It has lead me community where I serve and become involved in the areas that are life-giving. I still find comfort and restoration from my friends behind the screen, but I am becoming more open to in-real-life community.

I guard my heart from all the hurtful words and actions that might come my way, but I am learning to love in community. To find real relationship that leads me to Him. The healing found in retreat is beautiful. I manage the physical, I find comfort in the Word for the mental, and I find hope in the spirit of others that leads me deeper in my walk. 

Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
    will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. Psalm 91:1

Maximizing My Mornings

It is that time again...today ended the Winter Challenge with the Hello Mornings group. It also began the registration for the Summer Challenge. You might be asking what is Hello Mornings and how are you maximizing your mornings.

So glad that you asked- Hello Mornings is a group of women gathering all over the world to wake up before our families and spend quiet time alone with the Lord. We don't wake up to our kids, but to our Lord. This step alone maximizes the morning. There are several women who add the next component of exercising to so that they are their best physically. Basically we are accountable to one another for our morning time. 

My group happens to be on twitter. Several groups meet privately on Facebook. Check this out http://register.hellomornings.org/ 

Join us for the Summer and have the best Summer with your kids!

The Loss that Floods Your Mind with Memories

We were piled in the bed this morning finishing school and working on the computer. I had gotten up to grab something from the other room. When I returned she was breathless, head buried into my pillow and unable to speak. I quickly ask my baby girl what was wrong when she said that my best friend had text me.  Unable to understand I read the text which told of a mutual friend's husband passing away this morning.

We have waited for this call. The suffering and treatments have continued for years. As true fighting fashion though the bounce back would happen and life would continue. A few weeks ago though my friend shared her husband had fallen and had to be put in a nursing home for recovery. She hinted that he might not come home and to pray for the girls.

Their baby and mine have been friends since preschool. We have not missed birthday parties and attended church camp together every year. I feel that I have been trying to prepare my little girl for the moment her friend's Dad would no longer live on this earth forever, but when that text came I realized how unprepared we were.

As I held my baby and prayed for our friends, my mind flooded back to the day that numbness overcame me. I had just returned from a wonderful weekend introducing my boyfriend to my family. He and I had taken the long way back to college stopping  by to visit old family friends of his. I distinctly remember us commenting on the oddness of the sky as we drove the 2 1/2 hours across the Delta towards Starkville.

We arrived  home and I ran inside with my basket of clean laundry that I dropped on the floor so I could call to report my safe arrival to Mama (my usual post drive home call- oh the days before the cell phone that is everywhere with you). I dialed my home and my Mama's best friend answered the phone. This was odd because she might be at our home, but didn't really answer our phone. Mama spoke and the numbing words fell all over me. "Your Dad had a heart attack"-Mama "He is going to be fine, right???"-Me "No Sweetie, He didn't make it."

Those words spoken to me by my Mother 23 years ago changed my whole life. I was 20 years old and I know the things that I have missed and longed for as a daughter without an earthly Father. My daughter's friend is 11 and her sister 15. How my heart breaks for them tonight as I recall them being picked up at school to be told their Dad is no longer living.

I hugged both girls today. I shared that I understood it hurt. I told them we could get together and talk.  I would listen because even though I don't have my Daddy (his heart broke) their Daddy was lost to the horribleness of cancer. Our stories are different, but we are daughters without Daddies tonight.

My prayer for these precious girls and my friend is that they feel the cradling of the arms of Jesus the ultimate Daddy. May they find comfort in friends and stories these next few days. And Mr. Chuck say "hi" to George Trippe-my Daddy.

Memory Quilt

Making a t-shirt memory quilt is something that I have been planning since MK was little. My hoarding self has saved t-shirts since forever. I began several months ago the process. MK had pulled out her favorite shirts. I let them collect dust. I spent one night watching TV with the family while cutting the fronts off the the shirts then again more dust collecting. (I feel the dust intermissions will add to the sturdiness of the finished quilt).

This weekend I have been determined to knock off the dust. I spent today ironing the pellon onto the wrong side of the fronts. This was a two hour project with some carpool interruptions. I set the iron up so I could watch Food Network which helped because I do NOT like to iron.

After the ironing, I have decided to watch the Final Four minus a quilting project in my hands. My next step is to cut the fronts into 15 x 15 squares. I will take pictures, but so far it has been an enjoyable project. (Not much skill needed so far) I am struggling with what color to make the sash (boarder) fabric. I still have some time to think on this one.

I have attached the pattern from Goose Tracks that I am using.

http://www.goosetracks.com/T-Shirt%20Quilt%20Instructions.html

I chose this pattern because it gave me dimensions for every size from a lap quilt to a king sized quilt. The directions are thorough and easy to follow. Pictures to follow in my next post!

Gardening-Is this what I'm doing?

Gardening-Not my strongest suit (but I have been thinking as Philip is ready to plant his 2nd garden). Isn't this what we have been doing the past 18 years. Growing children.

I remember 18 years ago as Philip would ache for the days as MK grew- The little things-a new word, a crawl, a loss of toddler vocabulary for the "BIG" girl word. My sensitive husband might have sweated in his eyes a time or two over these changes, but not me. I was strong. I repeated to him over and over that it was my job to raise them to move out. Well here we are 20 something days left of high school and 30 something to graduation. (I am not the one counting)

I am still not a puddle of tears. As each "last" happens I am ok with it. I will so miss my oldest daughter and her need to ask me questions even though she does not want my opinion. Someone ask me just this week was I sad yet. My answer is the same. I am not sad because I see the excitement in her about what God has for her future.  I am hesitant as I think of all the things (and she tells me a few) we haven't taught her.  I have tried to enjoy every "last". I have watched her try to rush the future and tried to tie her down to the present so she doesn't miss this "last" event. I do not want to stop her from moving on though. I see God at work in her and I am in awe of the woman that she is becoming in Him. He is moving mightily. Does she have it all together-no. Do I-NO!

My gardening had me growing girls just 13 months apart. I know the early days of little sleep, many diapers, and shoes that matched in half size difference were hard. I think though today I am reaching the hardest of all so far. My sweet, strong, independent Sarah has brought me papers to graduate early. (Yes you did the math right-2 moving out within 6 months of each other)

My girl whose voice is sometimes muffled in the noise of a large family spoke up last Summer about the possibility of early graduation. I (like a good Mom) questioned the idea. She like my strong and independent Sarah laid the plan before me -every last detail. I sent her out of the room after picking up my heart and jaw then began to pray.

Well school began in the Fall and the idea reversed. She didn't want to leave early-it seemed the popular thing and neither of my girls follow that crowd. I even found myself begging her to reconsider-I felt God say "Go ahead. Let her graduate early. She would be serving me."  Time has marched on through MK's senior year. Details, deadlines and demands once again have pushed the discussion to the back burner.

Spring Break of 2013 happened and Sarah was renewed in her vision. She attended a mission with our youth to Nicaragua. In the minutes before her bag hit the floor, she was requesting to go this Summer for a month to Nicaragua. We like all parents put on the brakes, listened and investigated. And like our Sweet Sarah she felt God tell her no-continue with her Summer plans of a trip to Honduras.

Well back to this girl walking in my door this week with papers to graduate high school six months early & move to Honduras for a four months to learn Spanish & help in an orphanage. I am blaming the book I find on her floor by her bed at night-Kisses from Katie. (I knew not to let her read it)

Oh but my garden is not that small- see I have two other rows that I am continuing to maintain & weed & tend.

I spent the last six months homeschooling our 11 year old daughter. It has been a blessing. Her spirit needed some time to gain confidence. We have met great new friends & if I got to do this all over again I might just home school them all. (don't tell the other three-the don't like the idea)  Our intent was to home school through May. It is a season for us. She has longed to go into the all sixth grade school here. She has grown up there-me the volunteer, her siblings spending time there, the principal giving her endless amounts of candy. Well it seems that my season of growing this patch in my little garden will end soon. She is a sweet girl (who by her siblings account is spoiled) and has a heart for others.  Ugh to be honest-she would move out too and head to Nicaragua where her heart is for missions there. She prays for this country that she has never met. Oh Lord, please hold off a little while on her calling.

Our one and only son. That tall stalk of corn in our garden. He is growing as fast as a weed and finishing up his 7th grade year. He is growing physically but also as a young man. His experiences in youth, scouts and with school are making him seem so much older. I so remember the little boy that played with dump trucks and loved Veggie Tales. I watch God work in him as he is feeling called to lead in the local public school. He loves FCA, prayer breakfast (2-not for more prayer but more FOOD), and he leads by example.

My Garden is growing. I am a gardener. There are days that I see the weeds, but today I rejoice in the Fruit that God is allowing us to harvest. We are blessed with an abundance. So pray for this little patch of Garden, for these two Gardeners in training & these children who are listening to the Lord.

(in)courage

 I have jumped in to help my friend Karen @faithfamilyfibr  and my friends Kim & Judi as we (in)courage women with Chronic Illness. I joined the group last session as was blessed to pray with & walk through life with Godly women who struggle in this life with pain. We have various issues that have gotten us all to this place of chronic pain, but we have a common God who loves us through it all. Won't you join us...or another of our groups of (in)couragers.

What are (in)courager groups?
The (in)courager community groups exist to build safe, Christ-centered, welcoming, small groups for women through the (in)courage website and social media. With a variety of topics to choose from, the groups and your co-leaders are here to serve you, just as you are and where you are, in this season. We invite you to find a place that feels comfortable, where you can kick off your shoes, snuggle into the comfy couch and share your life with like-minded, Jesus-loving women around the world.
It’s a place where you can grow in your friendships with other women and be encouraged to deepen your relationship with God. (in)courager groups will be led by a team of women who have a heart for serving. They aren’t experts, but have a willingness to walk with others and (in)courage them along the way.
I was a leader of the Chronic Illness/Homebound group for the first session.  I am so excited that for this session  I will have three wonderful coleaders.  Our group is for those with a chronic illness or for those of you that are homebound.  We are a group of women wanting to encourage and pray for each other on a daily basis.  You can read more about and  join our group here.
Here is a little bit about each of our co-leaders of our group along with places you can find them!
Karen - I am first and foremost daughter to the King and wife for 12 years to my amazing husband Tony.  I am mama to 11 year old Princess and 7 year old Superhero.  As of last year I am also a homeschool mama.  I was diagnose with fibromyalia in 2009 after suffering with debilitating pain for 3 years.  My life has completely changed in the last 7 years and I am on a wonderful and blessed journey.  I became a born again Christian right before my second child was born so I was almost 40 years old.  My husband and I were baptized together about 5 years ago and the blessings just continue to pour in every day as we continue to turn our lives to God instead of the world.  I want all women with a chronic illness to be encouraged and know that God has great plans for them and that He will continue to bless them every day even during their difficult circumstances.  I want all women with chronic illness to have daily encouragement and support especially if they don't have it in real life.  That is why I started a blog and started leading this group!
Find Karen here - Blog, Facebook,  Blog facebook page, Twitter, Pinterest
Sallie - I am a wife  of  21 years to my college sweetheart. I am a mother of four great children-18, 17, 13, & 11. I spent several years serving in youth and children's ministry while my husband finished his Master's in Nursing. We began our own "small group" ministry at home so about 13 years ago I began to be a stay-at-home Mother which has since been my main job.  I have been on a journey discovering my Fibromyalgia diagnosis over the past several years. I am an avid reader about health and chronic pain. I am seeking wellness & joy in the midst of this pain. One thing that I have found for certain is that my relationship with Jesus makes all the difference in my outlook on this life (sometimes) filled will chronic pain.   I have joined @faithfamilyfibr to help encourage women who find themselves in this chronic pain boat. It can be a lonely place to live with pain issues, and finding other women who can encourage & pray with you is always a lifter of one's spirits.
Find Sallie here -  Blog, Facebook, Twitter

Kim - I'm a newly married, newly in my 30's New Yorker. In early 2008 I was diagnosed with three infectious diseases passed by a bug bite (gross, I know) after years of unexplained illness and lots and lots of inconclusive tests. It was something I never would have signed up for, but God used the next two years of serious treatment to draw me back to Him and completely change my life. Though the process was very painful and scary, I am in awe of a God who loves us so much and who never gave up on me even when I had wandered away from Him. I am "better" now in many ways, but I'm learning to accept that my body needs more TLC than others and that I just can't do a second of life without God's help. He has walked me through several more seasons of illness and continues to hold my hand through the long process of physical and emotional healing that follows years of pain. My dream and desire is to share that same love and the hope we have in Christ with others who are hurting from chronic illness and difficult life events, so that no one feels alone and no one feels hopeless. I'm so grateful to be a part of this community and to serve alongside Karen, Sallie, and Judi. 

Find Kim here - Blog, Facebook, Twitter 

Judi -I will be 54 this year.  I have been  a Christian since my early 20's and love the fact that I will keep learning about Jesus for the rest of my life!  I've worked as an educator for 16 years in a technical school.  Currently, I'm on disability and am a stay at home wife and mom to 4 kids.  Some of my hobbies are knitting, crocheting,rubber stamping/card making.  I love working with plants.  Our cats and dogs keep me company during the day.  I feel as though God to a place to encourage,love on, and pray for women.  We would love to have you join us if you suffer from any chronic illness or are homebound.  

Find Judi here - Facebook, Twitter 

If you are reader that does not have a chronic illness then please go over and check out all of the other groups.  There are so many that you can join.  Here is list for all of the groups for session two.  Just click on this link to read more about the Incourage groups!

Artists
Bible Study Gals
Caregivers
Chronic Illness/Homebound
Depression
Empty Nesters
Fitness/Lifestyle
Homeschool Moms
Hurting Families
Infertility
Marriage Mentors
Military Wives
Ministry Wives
Missionary Care
Moms of Teens
Motherhood
New Moms
Single Gals
Single Moms
Social Justice
Special Needs Stories
Working Moms
Women in Ministry
Women over 50
Writers

Hello Morning Challenge

Mornings. I loved mornings when I was younger. (Even in college I was known to wake early & have a quiet time.) After having four sweet children & hours of sleep lost, I have gotten to the place that mornings aren't my friend. I have fibromyalgia so it is easy to have days that I can't get up. What I found in allowing that to rule my days for awhile I realized that I was missing something. See when I didn't get up early several things had to go so that I could get to the things that "must" be done.  One of those things was my Bible & prayer time.

I found a group to help me overcome the cycle that I had allowed into my morning routine. Welcome Hello Mornings! After a year or more of participating in a group via Twitter, I decided to really jump in as an Accountability Captain (AC). I lead my first group-my #HMCCT ladies- in the Fall. I have been blessed in my quiet time and study with the Lord, but also in the encouragement and support of these ladies.

It is time to begin a new session. The Winter group begins January 28. There are many groups-different time zones & countries. Check out the info about the Hello Mornings Challenge. http://www.hellomornings.org/register/  I would love to have you with the #HMCCT group on twitter. http://register.hellomornings.org/sallie-belle-howell/

We will be studying Abounding Hope written by Katie Orr &Lara Williams. I have done several studies by these ladies and have grown in my view of the word  & the message for me. It is a study that you can do in a short time each morning or take deeper if you are ready. No one is required to do the study, but it gets you in the word each day then you have a group with whom to share your insights.

Now I know what you might be thinking, if I am not a morning person how on earth would I ever magically begin. That is where the group comes in to play. We set goals, share them & offer encouragement to get each other there. Some get there easier than others, but the best part is the GRACE offered from a group of like-minded Christian women.


Won't you check out the website? See if you want to join us in Waking Up to God instead of our Routines!

New Year & My ONE Word

I haven't blogged since the Fall. So many things have taken place and the world is moving a warped speed. (I have a million different topics floating through my mind as I write this now.) I prayed over my selection, I dug through scriptures, and I looked at other's One Word 365. There are so many good words out there to pick from and I struggled to find my ONE.

In the past, my word has been obvious that it spoke to me. This year I chose my word and still questioned 17 days later was it my word  or had I just settled. This week I think I have realized something- I have picked the right word.

My ONE WORD for 2013 is ......

Focused. See I feel scattered, disjointed, pulled, distracted and most of all not clearly FOCUSED. I am looking at a year of decision-Some for me, some that my children will make, and some with Philip.  As apart of a group study & church challenge, I was entering January with a food fast of sorts ( 7, a mutiny against excess by Jen Hatmaker). I thought this is the perfect storm to become FOCUSED.  Even as I began my journey into 2013, I have struggled by not feeling I chose the right word. I have finally decided this week that I am on target.

I have bounced from thing to thing &  thought to thought all week. I am beginning to feel like a ping pong ball. It hit me hard today- FOCUS! I am lacking focus.

So I decided to sit still, a write my thoughts. This will be a place where I can remind myself of my WORD. I believe the clearing of my body of yucky food & my thoughts from that food to God's call on my life is step one of the year of FOCUSED living!

New Challenge

I am going to try something new this Fall. I will be joining several ladies in being Accountability Captains during the Fall session of the Inspired to Action-Hello Mornings Challenge. I have been participating for about a year and must admit it has been a blessing for me. I have been studying my Bible, exercising and joining my new friends on Twitter for accountability with those goals.  God has blessed me with some wonderful new friends. Won't you click over to see more about this Challenge...
href="http://inspiredtoaction.com/hellomornings/">

Joy in Sharing...and a NEW product!

The youngest in the family is usually known for getting their fair share of hand-me downs. Not that I know this fact for myself as I am the lucky oldest, but I  have heard the rumors. When we found ourselves in graduate school with baby daughters just 13 months apart, we survived by using and re-using the girls clothes.

As the girls got older, our second daughter took full advantage of "sharing" while begging for new outfits. I said often that she always had the most clothes because she truly hated hand-me-downs. (Today she is my "fashion-ista" that we all ask for advice as we shop and dress).

Our third child arrived and he wouldn't have looked great in pink, floral and bowed outfits so I packed those goodies up and gave them to friends who had just adopted a daughter. Our caboose had arrived so it was safe to pass along our wealth of frilly frocks.

Two years pass and our precious tribe of three would be greeted by a new baby sister-SURPRISE! Those sweet friends whom we loaned all of our girl clothes to had passed them on to another friend. Before we knew it, bags of clothes found their way back to our doorstep.

One would think that the baby would be spoiled and never accept such re worn attire, but our baby girl loves to find bags on her door step. It would become like Christmas morning when "her" bags arrived. She would try on every item as if it were her own personal shopping spree at Macy's.

As I reflect on her eagerness to open bags of worn, used and sometimes stained clothes then put them on to wear with pride, I think of Jesus. Isn't that what He does for us?

He takes the worn - used- sometimes stained- puts it on Himself and is so proud to display us for all to see. We are made new. We are REDEEMED by His precious blood.

DaySpring has created this great new line of products to remind us of our Redeemer-Jesus. The Redeemed products offer many items that communicate Christ redemptive love for us. Check them out here.

I received products by DaySpring to review for this post. Thanks DaySpring for helping me spread the word of God's redemptive love.

My Brave Little Girl

I have four beautiful children, and they each make me proud. We have been blessed beyond belief with kind-hearted, Jesus loving, and beautiful children. (I am bragging-a Mother's right!)

It is so hard to believe that our oldest is  17 TODAY. This shy little girl has grown into a beautiful and strong young woman. She serves in church, in our community, she is an athlete and a good student. She is driven to be the best at whatever she is involved.

This girl in her early days was shy and fear-filled. It is amazing to see what God has done through her. I know that her life is still just getting started, and He has more things to do through her.

When she was little, she loved to dress-up. She and her sister would put on plays on our hearth where they sang at the top of their lungs. Both girls, when in public would hide behind me and stay as close as possible. 

Some days though, this shy little girl would leap off of the chair and proclaim "Marykathaleena!" We always have joked when she called herself  that name she was her "brave self".

Now that MK is older there are few days I see a shy, fear-ful girl. Lately, we see her shining her light for the Lord so brightly. Just the other night I witnessed by 16 year old daughter leap forward screaming-"Marykathaleena".

Her good friend encouraged her to participate in a school Parade of Beauties. Now my girl is beautiful, but she isn't normally one to put on a formal dress and waltz across a stage waving. Take a look at these pictures and you too will hear her use her brave voice.....










By the way, she was MOST BEAUTIFUL in the eyes of family and friends!

Happy 17th Birthday Mary Katherine!

Disciple Now 2012

The sound of music thumping my bones. Singing voices rising from below.

                Worship of 1000 teenagers over a weekend.

Words spoken, lives directed and changed for Him.

Hungry stomachs...food galore. Pizza, Mexican and sweets for more...

A time of serving for the youngest ones and us. Disciple NOW weekend for the oldest ones a must!

Collide the theme...
                Kids smiles they beam.
                         College students touching the lives of my teens
                                       Jesus words by no other means.

Getting to serve a blessing to me
            Glad I got to share this with my family!
                                                
                                  

Old Testament - New Lessons

Yesterday I was reading in Genesis (Day 12 of the Chronological Bible). I got to Jacob, Rebekah, Esau, Issac and my eyes were opened to several new truths.

First of all, I was hit smack between the eyes as a Mom when I read that Rebekah is the one who started the whole blessing reversal scam. It said that she grabbed Jacob and told him to bring two prized goats in. She overheard the conversation between Esau and Issac about the blessing and she wanted it for her "favorite"son.

Oh, my heart ached. Lord, help me not to be a Mom that schemes to change the blessing for my children. I pray that I'm not the stumbling block in their lives. I do not want to any day suggest that we do something to change their course. I pray that my life would be an example to them that leads them straight to God's plan and will for their future.

Secondly, I was taken by the Jacob's ladder story. I have sung.."We are climbing Jacob's ladder" since early preschool days. (hand motions and all) I never stopped to think about God speaking to me that way. I do dream vividly at night. I have had dreams about people I know and situations I am aware of. I realized this morning that God is might just be using my dreams to unfold something for me or people in my life. I need to seek Him more to see if this is the case. What is God saying to me at my Bethel? Am I hearing Him? Could He use me this way?

Where are you reading in God's word? What are you learning from Him?

The Blessing of Service

Twice a month, I volunteer at a local crisis pregnancy center. I meet women with all types of stories from all walks of life. Some stories are heart breaking, then other times we meet women whose stories become miracle stories. I leave there emotionally and physically drained most weeks.

Things that I've learned from my time there have changed my life perspective. I started volunteering the same week that the client services director began her job. Her story and heart can be read in this novel,

http://www.bethelroadpublications.com/cordofthreestrands.htm. I have learned to grow in my prayer life. She enters this facility, and we stop to pray for our clients, our staff, and volunteers.  I had an active prayer life, but her utter dependence was something I desired for myself.

I have been drawn to understanding a culture of women who find themselves in crisis pregnancy. This is not just teens. We see women of all ages, women who are married, single, rich and poor. I want to know their hearts when I meet them-where have they come from and how have they gotten in their place. I pray for these strangers whom I've only met for maybe 30 minutes and may never see again. I pray for these new lives that I view on a television screen.

I have discovered that I must abide with Him before I am truly prepared for my time of service in this place. I can not love these women like Jesus if I don't know His love for myself and my own sin. I hide His word in my heart so that I might share it with these women.

I met a lady just yesterday whose story shook me. I looked her in the eyes and told her that I do not have any way of understanding what she lives through, but I know in my life that I can not walk without Him. She had been raised by adoptive Pastor and his wife. How one earth did she find herself the center of the story that she shared with me? She knows about Jesus, she has walked with Him before...I gave her a Bible, a shared tear and a hug. We saw her baby on the screen. We talked of life in a new community of faith. Today I pray for her. I pray for hope, direction and healing.

Also yesterday, a fellow volunteer, whose heart had ached to be a parent walked in the door with her adoptive baby. One that came by surprise right after the celebration of the birth of our Savior. The joy that overcame this lady. The grace that flowed. I was awed at how perfect this new life brought out of horrible circumstances looked. God's grace was written all over that baby, her story, her new life.

I am so blessed that God shows me life that He wants me to see-broken life, healing life, hopeful life. I am digging in to see more of Him. I hunger to love like He does. To be laid open before Him as I serve the needy women of our area. I am a small part of a big picture that He works through this place, but I am blessed 1 million times over for every second I am there.

Where does God show Himself to you? Are you growing through service this year? Share your story...

Epiphany

It is Epiphany!
The day that we celebrate the Wise Men's visit to see baby Jesus. The Wise Men followed a star to a lowly manger where normally one would find animals, feed, hay, manure, muck...
Today they found Jesus. The Savior of the World. A tiny baby, soft and humble. What a rich find.

Out of the darkness, this bright light shone to the Wise Men leading them to this barn. Answers from the darkness. Light that shines on THE ANSWER.

I feel like I am in the beginning of a season of Epiphany. I have lived in some dark places over the past few years. I don't mean total depression, but some.
I mean a place with no answers. I have looked for healing from a disease that has caused some DIS-EASEMENT in my life. I am beginning upon answers.
I have felt a calling from God about something that he wants to lead me to. But what? I am still searching for that barn, but the light is leading me. (I feel it, I see it...I continue to search.)

I want to be Wise. I want God's wisdom for my life. I want to be lead to and by the Savior. I want to bow before his feet and celebrate His life! I want to see for myself His glory. I want to offer Him the best gifts that I have. I want to ABIDE-to dwell in His presence-to remain before Him.

Would you join me in Abiding this year? Do you have an Epiphany story...let's celebrate it!

Journey 2012

It is a New Year, 2012! I have been praying about and dwelling in several things to grow me this upcoming year. First, I have noticed several "bloggy" friends focus on one word for their year. I have decided to jump onto that bandwagon. My word for the year (cue the drum roll, please!) is ABIDE. I have spent the last few months hearing God speak this word to me. I plan to study, embrace and better understand the word and its impact on my life.

Second, challenge that I'm taking up is one offered to us in church yesterday. I had finished reading the Bible through in a year back in October. I had purchased a new One Year Chronological Bible thinking that I would jump right back into reading. Recommendation, is to not begin a chronological study in the middle-Common Sense runs deep in my family! Our challenge in church was to read more of God's word this year-whatever that might look like for you. (read a chapter, a book, a chunk, or the whole Bible I had been asking Philip about reading through the Bible in 90 days and then I remembered my Chronological Bible. Yesterday, I jumped back into my chronological study. I must admit that beginning with Adam and Eve was so much easier. (again this is Day 2 and all so I know that I sound like I've climbed Mt Everest).

Third, is a challenge that I began several weeks ago, but never stopped to blog about it. I am Hiding God's Word by memorizing Romans 8. This has been a bit of a challenge over the holidays. I have had a few wordy verses that are bogging me down. I have taken some of the hints and found them to be helpful. I am excited to be on this journey. I had spent several years with Beth Moore and her Scripture Memory plan. (2 verses per month/24 in a year). I can't wait to see a whole chapter complete in my heart!

I can't say this is really a challenge for the year, but it is something God is showing me so I want to document it. I have been feeling for awhile now that God was preparing me for something big. I mentioned before that I felt maybe our Spring Youth Mission Trip to Nicaragua was it. My first out of the country mission so I thought God was certain to let that be my BIG thing. Well, March came and went. Although it was impactful, I still have the sense of God's BIG preparation still happening. Well, I opened the book, Interrupted, by Jen Hatmaker and I sensed that God has been scheming for a while now. (again my common sense at work).  I see a pattern, a thread, a little clearing in the sky where He is writing. I can't see fully, but I know with abiding, reading and hiding I will understand more and more.

I am ready to dive in to 2012. I hope to capture the journey here.

My Gift

Advent- a coming into place, view, or being-arrival; the coming of Christ into the world.

As we begin the Christmas season, I had spent the Fall studying. My lessons covered the fruits of the Spirit-"Abiding Fruit". As a Mom, Wife, Daughter, Friend, Volunteer, Woman; I need to gain more love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, and self-control.

I have felt now for about a year, that God is preparing me for something. The feeling lead me in the Spring to answer a call to a mission trip. My feelings about 9 months later persist. I feel like in my study the view is becoming clearer. I feel, like my Christmas decorations, things are coming into place.

I tried introducing an advent devotional to my family. It is something that I am doing and wanted to share. I want this time to be a family waiting-waiting for our King. I know I can't push my waiting on everyone because it is my waiting. So I read, I study, I wait and I look. He is coming! The message that He is bringing to me will arrive in due time. I wait like a child on Christmas morning for the right time to open the gift.

I plan to view my gift with wide-eyes of excitement.

Lord, let me see your arrival - your gift to me. Let me rejoice in the arrival. Let me live out the calling.

Returning from A Long Bloggy Break....

I have been off discovering myself...
               finding a cure for fibromyalgia.....
                            searching for world peace................
                                         raising multi-millions to end poverty................

Ok, so you don't really buy all that either. I have been on a vacation of sorts. Summer, kids, home, vacation, school starting, being PTO President, volunteering at the local crisis pregnancy center, cross country season, soccer season, friends having babies (I've been to many baby showers for a 40ish year old woman), changing fibro meds (I don't recommend unless guaranteed a cure), oh you name it...I have been about doing it.

For a fibro sufferer, just reading all of that makes me need a nap. I have been living a very busy, busy summer and fall. I fully intended everyday to sit and tell the world-wide-anybody all about it, but I've been too busy living it. (then sleeping in-between).

I have been on a spiritual journey of sorts. I know that this part will flesh itself out in upcoming post. I am doing three things this Fall spiritually that really excite me. One, I am tweeting with a group of ladies who are holding one another accountable in our morning routines. It is nice to know there are other women out there trying to juggle it all and keep their relationship with God first.

 http://donotdepart.com/abiding-fruit

Second, I am following several of these ladies in a study of Abiding Fruit. We take a section of scripture and slowly walk through it for the week. I have seen God's word in a new way with very familiar verses. Well, finally, these ladies have led me to challenge number 3...memorizing Romans 8.

 We are changing the "ME" into "HE". We are Hiding His Word in our hearts. I have been walking with Beth Moore and her Siestas through memorizing 24 scriptures in 2011, but memorizing a whole chapter seems to be a challenge for me.

I am so excited to see what God has planned over the next several months through the journey. I planning on sharing it all right here.

Third, I am meeting with local friends who are holding one another accountable. God gives us friends for different seasons. These ladies you would never put together on any other occasion, but God knows what we need. He knows where we need sharpening and who can help us do that.

I plan to get back into the saddle with this bloggy business. Just don't dock my pay if I continue to take breaks-I'm a work in progress.